And it's time for another round of listing. I really enjoy 30 Days of List even more than when I started. It has been wonderful to look back at those list and see that snapshot in time. The last list was March 2014, only a few shorts weeks prior to Bradley's death. There have been two list prompts that have come out since: one in September and one in December. Both came at a time when I felt too raw to venture into answers that hurt more to say out loud and less to remain in silence with them. I am sure I would not have posted my answers but I also didn't want to look back at those list. I didn't want to decorate the pages with the sadness I carried.
September was especially a difficult month since it was the first birthday to celebrate in our family without Bradley taking pictures, sneaking cake and playing. I especially miss Bradley taking pictures. He had the full set up and loved it. DSLR is so wonderful because of the opportunity it affords to take a zillion pictures to get those perfect ones that capture the moment.
Shortly prior to the battery going dead on the DSLR, I had just discovered the last family group pictures we took together. I remember the day well. It feels like it happened 10 minutes ago. Everyone was busy - in their own rhythm when I decided to use the restroom. There was a consistent theme of everyone joining me in the bathroom regardless of what they were involved with doing at the moment. It was true on that day in May. The kids piled in and Bradley bounded up the steps from his office. He was excited! He had his Android phone (a present from his birthday in April), a remote control and the DSLR in his hands. He had purchased a remote control for an Android app that allowed him to take photos with his DSLR. He wanted to try it out immediately! With a huge smile on his face, he set it on the counter and we all gathered in as I sat on the toliet. They are the perfect photos and await when I am ready to view them again.